I recently returned from an enlightening trip to Quebec. I was there to participate in an eight day Landmark vacation course. Part of our time was spent in a coursework setting where we inquired into what triggers us in life. We also enjoyed lots of free time to walk around the city, meet in groups…
The thoughts that the mind produces can be a slippery slope. Since my last blog post about ghosting in relationships, I have received valuable feedback from so many readers, colleagues, and friends. Most have had similar experiences and have asked me for an update. It has been over five weeks since I last heard from…
Facts, nothing but the facts ma’am. This is what has happened: I was suddenly widowed 4 years ago after 23 years in a wonderful marriage. I went through a very severe depression for 2 years. I gained 40 lbs. I began to come out of the fog about 2 years ago. I started working out…
We’ve each experienced those times when our plans just fall flat. Maybe you wanted to lose 5 lbs within a month and gained 2 instead. Or perhaps you envisioned finishing a work project and then got hit with the flu and you missed your deadline. It may be a situation where you have been disappointed…
Ok I will admit it – I often enjoy working with alternative tools for self-awareness, development, and growth – like Tarot Cards, spiritual intuitive readings, and astrological chartings. One of my favorite tools is a deck of cards by New York Times best-selling author Don Miguel Ruiz, which is based on his best selling book…
I have looked life in the face with open eyes. I have learned that it takes courage to keep both feet in the game of life. I have learned since being on my own that I need to say NO to so many urges and impulses. Saying NO to the impulse is putting off short…
Happy New Year! Although I have not written a post since Thanksgiving, I have done a great deal of thinking during the past few weeks about where to go with my posts. I recently recognized that I am ready to move onto topics other than grief. Grief finally found its proper place within my psyche…
I had a meltdown yesterday and it is only December 2! After an intense session with my analyst, I returned home, ate lunch, and felt exhausted. I took a 2 1/2 hour nap with my cats and woke up feeling tired. Then I spotted the familiar red wrapped boxes in my kitchen. The day before…
The poet of the sixties, Rod McKuen wrote this short poem: “where do they go the friends who come into our lives like green leaves and leave like melting snow?” I think of this poem today as I remember the sunrise that I saw this morning. I was up early enough to see it because…
For the past year and a half I have had a chronic need to scratch the top of my head. This is a recurring condition that surfaces when I am under stress. As a result of the scratching, I have a bald spot at the top of my head in the crown chakra area. The…
Recently I was asked why I share such personal information on my blog. The questioner stated that he could not imagine “revealing” this kind of material in a public forum. I have been thinking about this query for the past couple of weeks. The verb to reveal comes from the 14th century old French reveler…
Project 1-15-15 is mired in celebration, joy, passion, and well-being. I am blogging, being of service, releasing weight, being social, participating in Landmark Education, and I am healthy. Mazel tov to the possibility of life, l’chaim to life. My personal suffering has lifted and I am completely available to the possibilities that life presents daily….
In my last post I spoke about my new project 1-15-15 which encompasses the rediscovery of my physical, sexual, and emotional well-being. Way back when I was a young woman, I imagined by the age of 60 that I would have all the answers, be totally together, and be congruent with the world in which…
This post reflects the beginning of a new chapter in my life. One of the primary side effects of grief has a somatic nature and can be experienced as weight gain or loss. In my case, I gained a significant amount of weight as a result of the medications I took for severe depression, anxiety,…
Dear Roy,Today is the third anniversary of your death. In some ways it feels like the other day that you left me so suddenly, and yet it feels like eons ago that were together. I love you, and will always love you. I will forever treasure your memory and respect who you are in my life….
The greatest joy in my life is when I am sitting at my small, round, wood-top table looking out at the ocean – my feet propped up on the chair and my body calm. These moments, minutes and oftentimes hours of being right here is a slice of heaven on earth. Often my cats join…
After my father’s death when I was 4 years old, the home my family and I lived in was filled with emptiness, sadness and silence. I was attached to a 48 year old mother who was inconsolable. My three older siblings and I were often adrift on an unknown sea of tears. One Saturday evening…
Today is Roy’s 73rd birthday – Happy Birthday Roy Jack Mankovitz – you are missed and loved today. I went to the cemetery this morning and brought flowers – I sat for awhile and spoke with Roy – telling him about the vicarious nature of life – how my moods and relationship to his death…
I have been asked since starting my blog of how I managed to get through the early days of grief. During the first 12 months, I depended greatly on a poem by the late Irish poet, John O’Donohue, entitled “On Grief” from To Bless the Space Between Us, which I have included below. A colleague sent me…
Rabbi Harold Kushner wrote in his best selling book When Bad Things Happen to Good People that bad things happen to good and bad people alike – and good things often happen to bad people. I knew before Roy died that life was not fair, but my personal relationship to this statement took on a…
