Living an empowered and fulfilling life

I heard what you said. I’m not the silly romantic you think. I don’t want the heavens or the shooting stars. I don’t want gemstones or gold, I have those already. I want… a steady hand. A kind soul. I want to fall asleep, and wake, knowing my heart is safe. I want to love, and be loved.

Shana Abe

Hello and welcome to my newly revamped website Whispers of Wisdom.  I first launched my website in 2014 with a focus on grief and loss.  I was drawn to these topics as my husband, Roy died suddenly of a heart attack in the summer of 2011.  Interestingly, I have been a licensed psychotherapist since 1995 and through the years I had studied and explored a variety of approaches for supporting clients who were dealing with grief and loss.  I had “successfully” worked through the deaths of my parents, a few friends, and many four legged companions.  I felt confident in my ability to handle death and loss.  In the initial months following Roy’s death, I quickly learned that I was not prepared for the emotional and psychological impact of being a widow.  Facing life on my own after almost 25 years of being with my wonderful late husband was daunting. The steps I initially needed to take in order to deal with  the emotional pain and to be on top of the legal responsibilities were unfamiliar, uncomfortable and agonizing. I faltered many times on my journey.

From the onset of creating my website, my intention has been to shed light on what I have learned about grief.  I hope to inspire my readers who are walking the path of grief to cultivate a sense of self-confidence to find their way through the painful aftermath of death and loss.  Ultimately I aspire to encourage others on this path to have faith in themselves and to learn that there is life after loss.  

It has now been 10 years since my husband’s death.  Four years ago, I moved from the beachside community of Santa Barbara to the high deserts of Tucson.  Although I have been writing during the time I have been living in Tucson, I have not published a blog since early 2018.  At the present time, I find myself in a very different chapter of my life and I have new insights to share with my readers.  I invite you to join me on this continuing journey of healing and self discovery.  

Kathleen A. Barry,  PhD

Latest Posts

Letting Go – Part 2

In this next writing, I am continuing with the theme of letting go. During the initial months following Roy’s death, the focus was not only on saying goodbye to his personal effects, it was also about saying goodbye to his physical presence in my daily life.  I needed to understand, without his presence, all of our…
Read More Letting Go – Part 2
letting go

The Journey of Letting Go

A friend was telling me about a widower she has befriended whose wife of 25 years died four years ago. She noticed that his home looks like a shrine to his late wife.  There are many photos placed in special spots throughout the house.  They are platonic friends and she feels attracted to him.  She…
Read More The Journey of Letting Go

Finding Joy in Times of Sadness

This being human is a guest house.Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comesas an unexpected visitor … Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sentas a guide from beyond.  Rumi When we have walked the path of grief for a long enough period of time, we…
Read More Finding Joy in Times of Sadness

When Life Gives Us No Response

I ended my last post with this thought: What I know now is that we do have a say in how our life is going to go. We can survive grief and hardship. We can learn how to thrive again. These are life transforming moments. If we bring all the transformational learning and teaching to…
Read More When Life Gives Us No Response

Life After Death of Someone We Love

This is a reposting of an article originally published in 2014. My late husband Roy died suddenly and unexpectedly on July  10, 2011.   I will soon be arriving at the three year anniversary of his death.  The journey of grief from that fateful day to today was filled  with terrible emotional pain, severe depression, unending…
Read More Life After Death of Someone We Love

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